I think popular interpretations make the colours of the stories of the Bible difficult to see. One such example is the story of Thomas. Thomas is popularly known as “doubting Thomas”. I think this label has made us miss :
1 how the story of Thomas has shown that asking questions about faith is not only good but could lead to an intimate understanding of the gospel. Wrote about this here.
2 How it was Thomas’s certainty that led to his doubt. He could not have faith in the resurrection because he was certain of what he has seen; the death of Jesus.
AT THE BEGINING OF CROSSROADS
I saw the words “wrestling with God” written in the Instagram bio of someone I follow and I thought, “this is the most accurate description of my faith journey”. Growing up in a Christian household, I genuinely thought I knew “all” I needed to know. All is in quotes because not all but the basics. You know Jesus is the way, the Bible is the word of God, no questions asked. Like Thomas, I was stuck in “certainty”.
I can’t remember when exactly my faith “started to unravel”. My current earliest memory about anything questioning faith was when I was at Redeemers University. Was in a gathering with people discussing how learning philosophy is bad because it would cause you to question your faith. Remember thinking “Why would I want a faith that crumbles at the sight of questions? Why would I want to serve a God that is threatened by my questions? Besides are there not Christians in philosophy?”.
I am not on the other side of asking questions. Like Jacob that wrestled with the angel at the riverside, I wrestle with God about my questions. My faith isn’t as “certain” as it used to be but it has evolved to be limp and a blessing. So far I have lost my “religion” and gained my faith. In some way, I have become like Thomas, having an intimate relationship with Jesus and the gospel.
